Good night!

Well I survived the two days off due to weather. Went to work and came home for an early lunch break. Ended up watching part of the Gov. Bologovich (however you spell the name) on Fox News pleaing for mercy. He is pa-the-tic. I dozed off during parts of it and ended up dreaming along with it. Have you ever done that? That is freaky. I guess he was talking about his daughters when I was dreaming I was in an old fashioned theater, you know the kind with the red velvet drapes and a piano player up front. They were adorable girls and dressed in those dresses that you see little "prostitots" wear in pageants. Remind me never to doze off watching FOX News again.
Anyway. I actually cooked bacon for dinner tonight. It was delightful. Had hash browns, biscuits, gravy, the whole nine yards. I think we are set on our high fat meal for several weeks now. I've been doing great on the food bit for the last several weeks. Lots 'o fiber and whole grains. My colon hasn't stopped thanking me. The good part is I have lost around six pounds. Hopefully it is six pounds of fat. Catch my drift?
Well, I've got a bad case of the hiccups. Mom, I'm thinking of you with each "screach" I make. I am your daughter that's for sure. Tomorrow's Friday and I'm ready for bed. Sleep tight my friends. Love you bunches! mar

"Twilight"

Well, I figured I would post on the blog. I know you all have been anxiously awaiting what is to come next.


We have just about survived the first day off due to icy weather. Yesterday was the slickest drive home ever. We have been here, in Oklahoma that is, now for six+ years and I don't recall it being that slick ever! People were CRAZY!! Sliding sideways into ditches, bassakwards down our neighborhood hills. (That reminds me, I've got to thank neighbor Grogan for the good laugh he gave us last night when he demonstrated his awesome driving abilities.)

Anyway, no school again tomorrow. (Someone may need to call in and check on us sometime in the early afternoon. I mean, I must be insane to ever want a day off of school due to weather. I may kill someone.) My dreams of a tranquil day off, curled up by the fire reading "Twilight" is complete fantasy. Instead, I get "The Twilight Zone." Words like idiot, stupid and fatty McFatpants filled the air. I heard the occassional whimper which was usually followed up with a shrill scream. I have learned today that my 13 year old knows more than me and that it is a wonder I passed the sixth grade because apparently they do math different these days and I don't know what I'm talking about. (Challenge: take a deep breath, quickly exhale and read the last sentence I wrote without breathing.) Anyhoo, hopefully it will be back to the ol' grind Thursday!

Before I leave you tonight, I will leave you with a quote I find oh so true:

The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.

Good night, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

Bath salts are a popular gift for the person who has everything. Now you can make them yourself with the classic scent of bacon!

Step 1 Heat up 4 strips of salt pork in a microwave. You could also use bacon, but the salt pork has more fat, giving you more grease for your mixture.

Step 2 Pour 2 cups epsom salt in bowl, then 1 cup borax.

Step 3 Drain fat away from meat and mix with a few drops of liquid smoke. The liquid smoke helps make the scent, it won't smell right without it.

Step 4 Mix the grease/smoke mixture into the salt mixture. Mix thoroughly by hand, or else it will not blend all the way. If there seems to be too much grease, add more borax and salt. If it is too dry, heat up more salt pork and repeat steps 1-4.

Step 5 Enjoy bacon scented baths by adding your salt whenever you take a soak. To store, just put it in a bottle and save it for later.

Friends

It is so good to have friends! I thought this was a great picture that illustrates true friendship. Through life's ups and downs, a true friend is someone you can count on. It is someone you can put on red poka-dotted bloomers with and enjoy the laughter that it brings!

I've been told.

I've been told by several people that I need to start a "facebook." Well, have not brought myself to figure out how to get friends. It's hard enough to get friends in real life, let alone on-line. So needless to say, I have a facebook space, or whatever you call it, but no friends, no profile, no information of any sort. Maybe I'll get around to it..... eventually.

So, I will give this "blog" stuff a try.

Now I know you are wondering why the name of the blog is "mary, cook me some bacon..." I will try to tell you in as few words as I can. The reason the name is "mary, cook me some bacon..." is because my brother is the biggest goof ball there is, and well, it is something he said to me one day and it has stuck. And that is that. Really. Oh, and I could not think of anything clever, and "mary, cook me some bacon..." was the first thing that popped into my head. I really am a simple person.